WHO COULD EVER LOVE ME?

The question, "who could ever love me?" is one that I think rings through everyone's thoughts at one time or another.  I know for me personally this question rears it's ugly head every once in a while.  Those are the times I throw the best pity parties.  Tears run down my face, my eyes swell up, and my nose plugs up.  I feel defeated, alone and worthless.  Everything seems to overwhelm me and causes me to doubt God.  I don't think I am alone, am I?

Life is hard.  Life is difficult.  Sure it'd be great if life was a walk in the park, but it's not.  Dreams become distant and buried deep within our soul and then eventually forgotten about.  Things happen, oh heck who am I kidding?  Life happens.  Disappointments, come and go like the wind.  Reality hits us right between the eyes and we become lost in a sea of depression and turmoil.

For the most part, my life is amazing.  But then there are those times when I am at my weakness and Satan hits me and hits me hard.   These are the times I become lost and broken.  He fills my head with

doubts and fears.  He continuously tells me how worthless I am.  He screams at me that I am unloveable.  He bombards me with everything in my past that I have ever done wrong.  He shows me how ugly I am.  He shoves my face in the mirror where I see every flaw, every wrinkle and every grey hair (which I hide).  Am I alone here?  Are there days when you feel absolutely pathetic?  Does anyone else throw pity parties?

Beaten down and overwhelmed, I run to the only place I can, the CROSS! 

1 John 4:10  This is the kind of love we are talking about--not that we once upon a time loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to clear away our sins and the damage they've done to our relationship with God. 

When Satan's lies have taken it's toll on me, I run to the cross.  For many years I lived in a state of pity parties for weeks.  Now it only lasts a couple of hours, if that.  I run to the cross as soon as I recognize what is going on.  I run to the cross and know beyond a shadow of a doubt, that God loves me.

God loves me so much that He sacrificed His only Son for me and you.  This agape love changes Satan's lies into God's truth.  It changes my heart and makes me realize that this love is something I do not deserve.  It is something I have never earned.  This totally unmerited, self-giving love can invade my heart once I close my ears to the lies. 

You see what I have come to understand is Satan does not want us to feel this love let alone embrace it and believe in it.  He will do whatever he can and use whoever he can to defeat this love in our hearts. His goal is to break our hearts and fill us with doubt.   His mirror image of me makes me feel worthless and ugly.  "God doesn't love you if there is a God." 

Let me tell you this; there is a God and He loves you more than you may ever fully understand.  He wants His love to invade our hearts and minds.  He wants to overwhelm us by His love.  He can turn your mess into a message, your test into a testimony, your scars into stars.

Life may be hard, life may be difficult, but when I fully grasp the agape love God has for me, life is amazing.  The cross has shown me the true agape love God has for me.  The cross reminds me that I am never alone.  The cross overwhelms me when I think of the torture Jesus went through for me.  Am I worthy of that love?  No.  Did I do anything to earn that love?  No.  This agape love God has for me is a gift freely given.  

Please accept this love today.  Let this love invade your heart and mind.  

Do not accept any more invitations for pity parties.  Mark them, 

"Return to sender.  Address unknown."    

 May the agape love of God invade your heart and mind today.  May the cross be a constant reminder of the agape love of God, in Jesus name I pray, amen.