ARE YOU PARKED IN YOUR PAST?

Philippians 3:13  No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it but I focus on this one thing:  Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead.  

Past - gone by in time;  no longer existing.  It is finished,  It is done.  It is in the past.  If it's in the past, then why are you still living there?  I know that one hurt.  It did for me too.  Many years ago I realized I had lived in my past for way too long.  The fact that my parents moved to Arizona crushed me.  It affected me or I should say that it infected me.  To be honest they did nothing wrong.  My dad's health was top priority and moving to Arizona was the best decision they could have made, but for me it was devastating.  The fact that it happened 31 years ago didn't dull the pain.  I never allowed this pain to affect my relationship with them, I don't think they know how their moved affected me.  I never became verbally angry with them, never lost my temper with them.  They were my parents and I loved them.  I may have wanted to but I didn't.  I spent years crying.  I spent years reliving this past pain.  I told almost everyone I met about the sad story of my past.  I parked in the pain of the past for almost 25 years.

I know that sounds sad but it was my reality.  Instead of focusing on the good times I had with my parents, the back of my mind was filled with the past of what they had done to me. Holidays and birthdays were filled with tears.  The pain for me became a badge of courage.  I would wear that badge to get attention and give me a reason for my pity parties.   Sympathy I received was adding to my reasons for keep parking there, you know, in my past.  Why do we allow our past to define us?  Why do we park in our past hurts?  Why do we keep a list of wrongs done to us?  Why do we wear our past as an excuse to live a pitiful, depressed life?

 Honestly the thoughts I had back then, sickens me now.  The way I parked in the past makes me physically sick to my stomach.  Listen everyone has a past, some more painful than others, but when we park in the past, when we relive every painful word, every painful hit and every painful wrong, why are we surprised that our life is pitiful?  Listen I had to answer this question honestly myself.  I had to get real and allow God to heal my past and teach me to let it go.  It wasn't easy because I had to deal with myself.  It wasn't my parents fault that I lived a pitiful life for 25 years.  Okay listen let me clarify, my life wasn't pitiful, my attitude was pitiful, okay maybe it was pathetic.  Anyway I think you get my drift here, at least I hope so.  

I will be as brutally honest here as I can be and I hope I offend you enough to make you stop and think.  Get over it!!  No matter what lies in your past, no matter how much someone hurt you, no matter what someone did to you, guess what?  It's over!!!  It's in your past!!!  I'm not asking you to forget what happened, but it's time to pull up your big girl (or big boy) panties and stop parking in the past.  Deal with it, talk with someone, seek counseling, whatever you need to do, but then move on!   We all experience pain to one degree or another.  Some pain is worse than other but pain is a fact of life.  We were never promised a life without pain.  You don't have to allow your life to be ruined because someone hurt you.  

When you park in your pain, you're settling for a life that is less than what God has waiting for you.  We can't always avoid pain, but we can choose to not let it ruin us.  Listen no one is perfect.  People sin, people commit crimes, people screw up and make mistakes, but we don't have to live in the past.    Your past cannot define you unless you allow it to.  Your pain cannot change who you are unless you allow it to.  Harsh?  Maybe but it's time to grow up.  It's time to let go.  Put your life in gear and begin traveling down that road less traveled.  You may be amazed at what God has waiting for you around the corner.

We cannot change our past.  We cannot erase the words spoken to us.  We may not be able to eliminate the physical pain we live with.  BUT we can learn to move on.  Stop parking in our pain and let it go.  Don't let pain ruin life.  

WHERE HAVE YOU SETTLED?

Genesis 11:31-32  Terah took his son Abram, his grandson Lot son of Haran, and his daughter-in-law Sarai, the wife of his son Abram, and together they set out from Ur of the Chaldeans to go to Canaan.  But when they came to Harran, they settled there.  Terah lived 205 years, and he died in Harran. 

You know what?  I have read these verses before a few times but I never really the reality of this verse until it was pointed out to me last week.  Take a moment and reread these verses.  Terah was headed to Canaan, but he settled in Harran.  Did you get it yet?  Canaan was the promised land God gave to the Israelite's.  Canaan was the promised land.  It was a land flowing with milk and honey.  It was a special place God chose for His people.  But Terah never got to Canaan because he settled in Harran,  He settled!  He stopped  his journey and settled.  He basically gave up his dream.  He lived 205 years and died in Harran.  He died where he settled.  Are you going to die where you have settled?  Are you going to be like Terah and give up on your dreams? 

What if Terah had made it to Canaan?  Would that have made a difference in his life or the life of his family?  The sort of funny thing about all this is many years after they had settled God told Abram (Abraham) to take his wife and leave Harran and his family.  God did not want them to live in Harran, He had a better plan, a better place.  Would Terah's life have been different if he had continued on to Canaan?  We will never know because he settled.  Okay maybe there were extenuating circumstances.  Maybe there was a list of excuses a mile wide, but maybe, just maybe Terah could have made it Canaan if he had tried harder.  I don't know the what if's of the if only's but I know that things could have been different if he had not settled where he did.

Where have you settled?  What comfort zone are you afraid to step out of?  Is the gear shift of your body in park?  It's time to put your car in gear, it's time to step out of your comfort zone.   It's time to stop settling and go all the way with God.  I know for me personally I have settled.  I have allowed myself to slip into my comfort zone, put my body in park and settle.  I get tired, I get frustrated, I get upset, I get sad.  It's so much easier to sit and turn on the stupid TV and watch mindless garbage instead of reading the Bible or a book that can help me be a better me.  It's so much easier to park at the point of my pain and never let it go.  It's so much easier to have pity parties and make excuses for myself.  It's so much easier to live with a chip on your shoulder, expecting the world to commiserate with you.  It's so much easier to put the car in park and settle where you are than take a risk of getting hurt or damaged.  

I've discovered that when we settle, there is something in our soul that dies.  Our hearts fills with regrets and we bury ourselves in our comfort zones. That dream, that hope, that vision of what could be dies.  We become lazy and physically sick.  Our hearts become hard and distant.  Sometimes we become depressed and jealous.  As we settle, we lose focus on what's really important and we focus on ourselves.  The risk far out weighs the rewards right?  Wrong!!!  

Life is a journey and if we settle we may never be able to experience the joy waiting for us just around the corner.  As we travel through this life there is so much joy awaiting us, yet for some of us we have chosen to stop, settle and focus on the pain.  To me that's like taking a car ride to the Grand Canyon and stopping because the road is too long and the journey too rough.  If we knew the Grand Canyon was right around the next turn, would you keep going?  Or settle?  "Well, we got close at least."  Listen close only counts in horseshoes, not life.  You have no idea what is lying just around the next bend in the road.  If we stop and settle we just may miss our promised land. 

God has a plan for each and every one of us.  His plans for us is not like anyone else's.  Our promised land may not look like our brother or sister, but than again maybe it can be similar but we just gave up and settled too quickly.  Where have you settled?  It's time to put that car in drive and go all the way through with God and finish the journey He has for you.